A picture is worth oh so much more…

After a year of feeling jaded and “hating” photography; after a year of referring work to others and avoiding my camera as much as possible, I decided to re-launch my site and get my butt back in gear. Really, Julie decided that it was time for me to quit sulking and get my butt back in gear a few months ago – but being stubborn, I stalled a little longer.

First things first, computer upgrade. A whopping $500! No problem, I budgeted for this and was prepared to bite this bullet. Besides, I upgraded to a Mac and got awesome service from my friend JT at PC Repair Orlando. I did not however budget for the radiator on my car going out just a few days after my purchase. Deep breaths. $631 later, really deep breaths. 

I take a week or so to recuperate and then decide to finally update the website. God, being awesome, sent some unexpected income my way which I use towards that $200 fee. That same afternoon, the starter in my car decides to join my radiator. $175 later, I’m flatlining. “Why am I doing this again?” “This business is so expensive!” “I can’t afford to do this on my own!” “People don’t appreciate photography anyway!” Yet, instead of cancelling everything and retreating back to my little hole, I decide to keep moving forward.

Two days after that, I am sitting at my computer, selecting images for the site when I come across a picture I took of Julie over a year ago. “Julie”, I exclaim, “You’re positively stunning!” She comes over and – for the first time in the five years since I’ve known (and have told) her – she says, “Oh my God, I’m pretty!”

There, in those few words is my priceless reward.

Oh, and other priceless moments…

• God in His awesomeness also allowed that very picture to be featured on WordPress photography
• OK Go allowed me to use their song on my site
• Bludomain is amazing

Wedding Photographer

Tuesday was Free Pastry at Starbucks. I contemplated and deliberated over how much I wanted to “pay” for a free Bucks pastry. “Think of your health”, I told myself. “Remember, you don’t want to be a fat *fill in the blank* at any of the upcoming weddings”, I chided. And then, I had an epiphany. It was as clear as a picture, really… a picture of my veil.

In the past few years, it has come to my attention that perhaps being a wedding photographer may not be the best thing for the self-esteem of a perpetually single 30 year old. Actually, in light of a series of recent events, this profession is most certainly detrimental to this 30 year-olds’ self-esteem.
This one had my colors… This one used my location… That one took my engagement ring, my flowers, and my wedding band. She took my idea for favors… She stole my theme song… She went and got my dress.
That one’s using my menu… This one’s going on my honeymoon… This one looks amazing posing just as I imagined… That one wore my veil… beautifully down the aisle… dragging with it all hope I had left.

Seriously, at this point, since I’ve already witnessed, changed, edited, scratched, reworked, and then photographed my dream wedding in a myriad of ways, I might as well order a cup of Starbucks’ 8000 Cal whip cream, demand my free pastry, get fat and die.