I wake up to the sound of my mother calling on my cell phone. We have a brief one-way conversation in which she asks questions and I grunt. Then it occurs to me that I slept through the night without having to take my meds. So I should probably take them now before the pain kicks in. But, since I can’t take them on an empty stomach, I should probably make breakfast first. I head downstairs only to discover that my blender was still dirty from last night’s dinner – along with some other dishes in the sink. Now I have to wash dishes first. But, seeing as I also didn’t unload the dishwasher, it would be better to unload the dishwasher (placing all of the clean dishes in the cabinets), then wash the dishes in the sink and use the now empty dishwasher as a dry rack, and then make my frozen fruit smoothie.
Ok, smoothie in hand, I make my way back upstairs to take my meds. However, there is a funky taste in my mouth and I don’t want it to ruin my carefully made concoction. So maybe I should brush my teeth first. No, that’s stupid. Why would I brush my teeth before I drink my smoothie? Not only will it completely ruin the taste, but I’d have to do it again after. And brushing my teeth has become so much more complicated since I had my mouth plated shut. I’ll just rinse it a little – just enough to get the funky taste out of my mouth. Oh great, I have somehow spilled something on my nightshirt, one more item for the wash. I should probably put it with the laundry pile now; I hate it when I forget to wash something. But now I’m half-naked. I can’t put something else on, I haven’t showered yet. Maybe I should just shower now, get dressed, and then take my medicine.
Half-way through my nice warm shower I realize that I haven’t windexed my glass shower door or bleached the shower stall since I came home from the hospital. So out came the economy size bottles of Windex and Clorox. Perfect, now everything is squeaky clean, including me. But I can’t get dressed without moisturizing, I have dry skin. So out, also, with the bottles of Gold Bond and baby oil. Ok, now I’m dressed and ready to take my meds and drink my no longer frozen smoothie.
Um, I wonder why it’s called “baby oil”. Better yet, why have I not taken my medicine already? You know what? This reminds me of that cartoon strip I saw on YouTube by that guy. How funny! I think I should blog about this, I really don’t blog enough. But first I should find his name because I would like to give him some credit. No actually, first I should sort my laundry; put a load in the washer, and blog while it’s running. No, no. First I have to take my medicine.