There have been very few times in my life when I envied men’s fashion. Not that I don’t appreciate a well dressed man. In fact, I’m extremely appreciative of a man whose wardrobe complements my own. But, seeing as I have so many wonderful options as a woman, there’s rarely a need to envy men. Except, of course when it comes to undergarments and Christmas season. Though deep-rooted, my hatred for medieval underwire bras and flesh-eating pantyhose will have to be discussed in a different post; for at the moment I am green with envy and red with frustration as I stare at the rejected pile of clothes.
What man isn’t at any moment ready for holiday festivities? Just tie on a cravat with a little shimmer, and he’s set. He doesn’t even need to worry about the traditional holiday colors. Make it a bow-tie and he is immediately gift-wrapped geek chic. But perhaps, you will argue, that he doesn’t like the restrain of a collar. Two words: sweater vest.
And voila! He’s ready for whatever or wherever your holiday celebrations may take you.
Not so with women. More specifically, this woman. Trying to look festive for a holiday party without looking like a giant ornament is virtually impossible. Everything is either that awful color combination I would never wear at any other time during the year, or woven with yarn that spun its way through the glitter aisle at Michael’s. Granted, I’m a bit harsh when it comes to this subject. After all, as far as I’m concerned, by its very definition, a “Christmas sweater” is a fashion faux pas that will not stumble into my closet. And don’t even get me started on velour. But take it from someone who’s searched the racks far and wide, holiday attire for women is a sorely neglected trunk in the house of fashion. I think I can rest my case by pointing to the popularity of “ugly Christmas sweater” parties.
Ho! ‘Tis the season for this Fashion Grinch to loathe her closet and covet the gifts under the other tree. The month has just begun. Holiday party number 2. And I’m already weary of Christmas wear, desperate for anything that whispers, rather than obnoxiously shouts, “Merry Christmas, I’m happy to be here and I will convey that by blinding you with sparkles”. Something classic and subtle… like pearls.